Working Group Progress

Protecting our Children Working Group

Our POC group and the VOTF colleagues and friends who volunteered their help at the Massachusetts Child Sexual Abuse Prevention Partnership Conference, "Taking Action to Prevent Child Sexual Abuse: Strategies for Your Community," were rewarded with thoroughly researched and brilliantly presented keynote talks by Dr. Vincent J. Felitti and Jan Hindman, M.S.

Vincent Felitti, M.D., Department of Preventive Medicine of Kaiser Permanente Medical Care Program, drew on his work, The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study, to show "a powerful relationship between our emotional experiences as children and our physical and mental health as adults, as well as the major causes of adult mortality in the U.S."

With the help of the Center for Disease Control and 18,000 volunteers (average age, 57), Dr. Felitti and his colleagues looked at eight categories of household dysfunction and childhood physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. They found a relationship between the number of categories of dysfunction and/or abuse that the volunteers experienced as children and the health problems these volunteers experienced as adults, such as alcoholism, drug abuse, depression, job difficulties, and suicide attempts. Their "two most important findings are that adverse childhood experiences (1) are vastly more common than recognized or acknowledged and (2) have a powerful relation to adult health a half-century later." Based on the ACE Study findings, Dr. Felitti believes, "More research and training will provide physicians and others with the confidence and skills to respond to patients who acknowledge these childhood exposures." He also recommends a new paradigm that expands the role of the community in educating both children and adults about abuse of all kinds. Medical, social service, church, school, public safety organizations, families - all members of society - must cooperate to provide for the healthy growth of children, locate and rescue those who are exposed to abuse, and prevent abusers from preying upon children.

Jan Hindman, M.S., LPC, Clinical Director, It's About Childhood - THE HINDMAN FOUNDATION, Inc., warned the audience that she might shock us with her straightforward discussion of sex. She pointed out that parents, who should be the primary educators about sex, have failed because of their discomfort with the topic. As a result, generations of children have been getting their sex education (often wrong) from other children and from TV (often inappropriate for their age). If parents were comfortable talking with their children about sex, children with questions would know where to go for trustworthy information. Primarily, the message should be that sex is good under the right conditions. Establishing communication with children begins very early; as babies, children sense how their parents react to troublesome matters. Too often parents have been more comfortable punishing children when presented with awkward or unnerving situations. Punishment that fails to teach may disrupt sexual development; a child then stays frozen at that sexual stage. Parents who take the time to struggle through tough discussions give their children healthy sexual perceptions of themselves.

In her workshop, Ms. Hindman presented "Ten Commandments of Raising Sexually Respectful Children." For example, a parent whose child is making obscene phone calls needs to discover whether the child is seeking excitement or wants to taunt the other person. If power over another is the purpose, then the child needs to learn about vulnerability and how to respond to being vulnerable. Ms. Hindman's A Very Touching Book also deals with the importance of trust and communication between parents (and other responsible adults) and children. The straightforward style of both her presentation and her book shocks and humors adults into acquiring the knowledge and taking back control of what their children learn about sex and when. The message is parental responsibility for well-informed and trustworthy education of children for healthy sexual development and healthy sexual maturity.

A panel discussion, "The Myths and Realities about Child Sexual Abuse Offenders and Victims," was led by Richard Hoffman, Writer-in-Residence, Emerson College; Susan Gallagher, Associate Professor of Political Science, University of Massachusetts-Lowell; and Robert Baker, Director of Operations, Massachusetts Sex Offender Registry. The most common myth is that children are sexually abused by strangers. In reality, the majority of child sexual abuse victims know the perpetrators. A poignant moment occurred when Richard Hoffman asked the following groups to stand and remain standing: (1) anyone who had been abused, (2) anyone whose parent(s) had been abused, (3) anyone whose sibling(s) had been abused, and (4) anyone whose spouse had been abused. Almost the entire audience was standing. Richard Hoffman, himself a victim, said, "Look around; you are not alone. You never have to be alone or silent again."

The morning concluded with a presentation of the Martha May Eliot Child Advocate Award to Frank Fitzpatrick. Frank is an adult survivor of childhood sexual abuse in the early 1960s at the hands of Father James R. Porter. Frank tracked down Porter, taped incriminating phone conversations with him, located other survivors, investigated the Catholic Church's cover up, and spoke out publicly.

For more information about the Massachusetts Child Sexual Abuse Prevention Partnership Conference, go to www.masskids.org and click the box labeled, "Taking Action to Prevent Child Sexual Abuse: Strategies for Your Community."

(Ed. The Massachusetts Child Sexual Abuse Prevention Partnership is a newly organized collaborative of statewide private and public agencies and recent recipient of a Center for Disease Control and Prevention grant. The Massachusetts Sexual Abuse Prevention Partnership received $215,000 to identify and pilot innovative programs in three Massachusetts communities.)

Priests' Support Working Group
Reported by Svea Fraser

The Sounding Board meeting held in May affirmed the value of small group meetings between priests and laity. Meeting in a setting conducive to sharing stories (preferably around a table with some food!) offers an opportunity to build relationships and better understanding outside the parishioner-pastor roles.

We were told by one priest, who confessed to not wanting to have come that evening, that he was glad he did. The reason: it was good to sit with people who care about their Church and want to speak about their faith. This is the best thing we can do to support one another.

We hope to have one more Sounding Board before the summer begins. We encourage people to continue the conversations beyond the initial meeting. There are discussion topics listed on the website under Clergy Support. Not only does this open the door for collaboration, but it builds on our catholicity and our connection to all Catholics.

There have been some fruitful events focused on our goal of supporting our priests. In Rhode Island, a panel of five priests took part in a discussion. Three questions were posed:

1. Clericalism: does it exist and what does it mean to you?
2. Are you comfortable about sharing your ministry with lay members, and are you taught this in the seminary?
3. What is your opinion of Parish Pastoral Councils and do you have one?

If any affiliate needs help or input in conducting a similar panel, please contact us through the website.

There is another way that priest-laity dialogue can be promoted - download the priest survey conducted by the Winchester, MA Area PV and use it as a tool for discussion. Better yet, do the survey in your own diocese. Directions for doing so are available on the website, and members of that committee would be willing to help you with it. The results of widespread use of the survey would be twofold: First, it serves as an affirmation for the priests interviewed and, second, it would be a rich resource of information for the bishops.

With summer coming, the SPWG working committee is not planning on meeting. Rather, we encourage a time of rest and reflection, and of course constant prayer for our faith community-for all the people of God: laity, religious, priests and bishops.

Please let us know of your efforts in support of Goal #2. Share the wealth! Increase the blessings! Thank you for all you are doing to manifest the reign of God in our midst.

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